Australians claiming Tall Poppy Syndrome is a uniquely Australian trait has always been a myth and it’s now been thoroughly exposed by the Coldplay Kiss Cam saga.
The issue dominated most people’s internet feeds late over the weekend and continues to do so this week. Three days in, the video had been shared 100 million times and spawned almost as many memes.
Most of the world revelled in a rare moment of global unity, seeing a rich tech guru taken down by his own actions. The world’s joy was compounded by his love rat status.
CEO Andy Byron’s resignation wasn’t a surprise. The shock was how long it took.
Attention quickly moved to Chief People Officer Kristin Cabot and then a grinning colleague, also captured on camera who was pegged as being an accessory for not blowing the whistle on the couple. Her fate now hangs in the balance.
Who knew the company they all worked for, Astronomer, or what it did? Ironically, Wikipedia is now debating whether the start-up deserves a page in its own right.
Plenty of crisis managers have weighed in on the issue (and shoot me if I refer to it as “Coldplay-gate”) and they’re all stating the obvious by saying Byron needed to own the problem and show immediate contrition.
Even that wouldn’t have saved his skin.
In the same spirit, here’s some free advice for the Board that Byron left behind.
Being a billion dollar company means you’ll survive. Cabot and or Byron won’t fare so well but selling the rights to their story will tide them over for a while. After that, reality TV awaits with a new US season of Love Island a possibility.
This was none of the Board’s doing but you still need to conduct a short, sharp inquiry. This will lead to a root-and-branch review of your corporate culture.
You should then appoint a new CEO and let her drive a restructure that Astronomer has changed for the better.
Lean on Coldplay to license you some of their aural wallpaper, sorry music, pro bono for a bold marketing campaign. Positioning in the market is advisable in case Andy Byron runs as an Elon Musk-backed candidate in the US mid-term elections.
Craig Regan, Senior Account Director, Primary Communication
